Why Fathers Should Not Get Therapy.

Or, should they? Will it be privileged and confidential or will the court subpoena those records for all to see?

Generally speaking, men benefit from counseling even though they might not like to ask for help and even though they imagine themselves as a “stoic impenetrable wall.” Counseling can be a tremendous help with conflict resolution. As Paula Schrad, a Licensed Professional Counselor in Naperville puts it, “Not every man needs to see a therapist, to be fair. Many people adjust well on their own, drawing on guidance from family and trusted friends and inner resiliency. But the stresses of ordinary life can sometimes threaten to overwhelm an individual’s coping and support systems. Some men try to “numb themselves” by throwing themselves into their work or using alcohol and drugs as avenues of escape.”[1] Schrad cites the sharp increase in suicide rates among men which increased for men from 50 and 59 during the “man-cession” between 1999 and 2005 where twice as many men as women lost their jobs.

According to GoodTherapy, mental health issues may also manifest differently in men than in women. This may result in mental health issues going ignored and untreated, and of men being accused of “anger issues” or “acting out” rather than being offered mental health treatment and support.[2] Challenges listed there included the pressures of fatherhood, intimate relationship issues, isolation and depression, lack of access to treatment, economic barriers, masculine gender roles, and bullying or ridicule (especially for young men).

Most therapy enjoys the “privilege” of confidentiality. That means no court can compel the production of information or testimony about the therapy without the consent of the patient. If it weren’t for this kind of privilege, who would ever say anything to a therapist?

Sessions with a psychiatrist or licensed therapist that are ordered by the court or to solve a legal problem associated with a divorce or custody dispute are generally not completely privileged or protected from discovery. However, when a father volunteers for therapy (i.e. –wife suggested therapy) solely for his benefit, then to the extent he does not talk about the therapy with another person (i.e. – wife) or involve another person in that therapy (i.e. – sessions with wife), then that father as a patient demonstrates he intended those communications to be confidential and privileged.

In a Missouri divorce, however, Missouri fathers have an unexpected reason to avoid therapy: the likelihood that what he said in therapy with the counselor or psychiatrist will become evidence against him. Missouri courts have increasingly invaded the physician-patient privilege where there is an “allegation” of “suspected child abuse or neglect.”[3] All it takes is an allegation. In Seyler, the court stated that § 210.140 RSMo is a tool triggered by the “best interest of the child” factors required to be considered by §452.375.2 RSMo. This “tool” is triggered by facts on the record supporting “situations involving known or suspected child abuse or neglect.”[4]

The facts considered by the appellate court in Seyler were on-the-record, and the trial court should have considered that evidence presented at trial.

Relying on Seyler, too many courts approve the production of privileged records based upon mere allegations of abuse. These allegations typically occur before trial and before there is any evidence on the record.

Allegations without evidence should not be sufficient for any court to invade the counselor/psychiatrist-patient privilege and order the records be surrendered. It will be up to your lawyer to argue against this, and also to limit the use and circulation of those records by demanding a protective order. Finally, your lawyer must preserve your objections properly for appeal.

Family law matters often have important, technical issues, such as the medical records privilege, which require the skill of an experienced attorney.

No legal matter gets better with time. Call now for your complimentary consultation.

Gordon Rea, 314-396-7177

[1] “Why Won’t Men Go To Therapy?”, Paula Schrad, August 18th, 2015, AFC Counselors, http://afccounselors.com/why-wont-men-go-to-therapy/.

[2] GoodTherapy, https://www.goodtherapy.org/learn-about-therapy/issues/men-issues.

[3] Seyler v. Seyler, 201 S.W.3d 57, 63 (Mo. App. E.D., 2006), citing Pilger v. Pilger, 972 S.W.2d 628, 632 (Mo. App. S.D.1998).

[4] Id.